Log in

Seriously, I've been into the Final fantasy series for, like forever. I even went as-so-far as to try and steal FF9 from a video rental store (I was caught, boo) but it really has influenced me in my artwork and fiction for a hellaova lot of time now. There's even a cache of half finished fics in a folder that says, "Not unless you're desperate to get bitchslapped on the fan sites." >.>

But. Oh my fucking GOD. Tseng x Reno, yes, YES! I stumbled upon it, I'm shamed to admit, but from the very first paragraph I was hooked! Just the flow between them, Reno's snarkyness and Tseng's proper 'Wufei' attitude, it gets me in a way I'll never be able to explain. And never mind the hot, HOT sex, that has nothing to do with it at all, really. <,<;


*...goes to find more* Aaaaah!


Child's Play is still retarded

I don't know why they insist on replaying all the crappy old movies I was better off without. As I speak there is a Friday the 13th marathon, Nightmare on Elm Street 5, and now Child's Play, to give us that rounded off feeling of hopelessness.

God, I fucking hated Chucky when I was a kid...I think I just plain despise the damn thing now.




The Blushing Bride *Yet more hentai art =3*

<sub>And possibly some sort of tea cake with orangce glazing.</sub>

Title: The Blushing Bride
Rating: NC-17 for exposed genitalia and adult situations.
Models: #1 & #2, both Gorgous Twenty-Two Year Olds Who Inspire Much Nakedness
Tools Used: Mechanical pencil, Corel 9, Photoscape, MS Photo Editor
Music: Poison - Groove Coverage

The Blushing BrideCollapse )



Yush, I'm now a checkout chick. And since I've been gone into the wild yonders of a world without LJ, I've gotten a little bit more pervereted. So, all of my dearest oldest friends, the ones Ive neglected for so long it's not funny anymore, you might not wanna know me anymore. And I guess I'm okay with that.

Really, these tears mean nothing. n.n

New Animes: Junjou Romantica, Sensitive Pornograph
New Books: Monstrum, Wihtout Warning, Delores Clairborne
New Music: Bullet for my Valentine, HIM, Basshunter

New Art Styles: Hentai, Tribal, Tentacles
New Eyebrows: yeah, I've been introduced to wax. >.<
New Editing: Lineart colouring, manga refurbishment

More later.


Jul. 28th, 2008

Long time, no see? *sighs* I'm a terrible LJ friend, I feel so guilty for not looking at everybodies pages, and yet...when I'm online....

It just takes too freakin long to load, really, and I get so frustrated with it I usually don't even bother. And I'm not forking over 300 bucks a months for broadband, either. Can barely pay my rent as it is, so, meh, I shall remain a horrid LJ friend. XD Just question my sanity, it's easier on all of us....living in here....fibrous fiberglass womb...>.>


I have found a site with the hottest tasteful sex scenes from all the big foreign and national films, devoted entirely to the homo-erotic side of life. Oh, betchour sweet ass I'm watching them like nutso crazy. THERE'S SONG TO A SIREN IN THE BACKGROUND which, as of the mo, makes my days all different kinds of colours. Happiness is virgin sex hip syncs. XD

New fav movie, too, The Bubble, or Ha Boah. Gorgous, simply awesomely gorgous. I think I'm growing out of the FMA and GW fandoms too, for some reason. Though I have ordered GW, and it should be here, and that's going to be one amazingly long weekend. *Rubs fingers together with evil giggles* Oh, man, Scythe, I'm gonna pause on you like mad. LONG LIVE THE BEAM.

Excuse my disjointed rantings, I'm watching chubby men shake their booty and giggling like a loon, which makes this so much harder to type. Viva le budgie smugglers. Love you all!


Uh, heeeey....whazzat? Emmy has a job? Emmy's bought herself a new computer? Oh my, did Emmy just realise she can come back to Livejournal without her system crashing every two seconds? She has, and really must stop referring to herself in the third person, it's creepy and slightly disorientating. >.>

AND I FINALLY OBTAINED THE FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST MOVIE. (Was actually a little disappointed) Where's the love? Snobby, depressed, horribly non-tactile Edward....

Anyway. EnvyxEd. Slashy goodness. Without consent.           

Shit, I crossed that line now, huh?


Summary of 2007

I'm writing this like a bio for some reason - it seems kind of fitting that I step back from it.

New Year 2007 - Impossible to say how long the night lasted. Whilst dancing with Dave to incredibly infectious trance music, she realised how shortly theryears passed, and ended up sleepless for that night because of the thought of time and all it left behind. Vaguely remembered.

January 12th - The anniversary of her mothers death. The day was a blur, and sad, and incredibly lonely.

May 14th - Emily realised it was her birthday three hours after she woke up, and then pretended not to notice the date until given sweet, sweet presents and kisses. Sad moments, but overall pretty good.

June 15th - Mary and Elizabeth were born in the local hospital, impossibly pink and icky with the loveliest blue eyes. Was sew up in unimaginable places, and had the rare opportunity of seeing her husband bawl like the baby he held in his arms. After a brief panic that lasted about three minutes, she embraced the idea of motherhood fully, and fed her babies for the first time.

June 20th - due to unbelievably sore nipples, she bitched at Dave for a record breaking nine hours, and eventually made it up to him with delicious deserts and hired movies.

September 8th - Received a phone call from her sister while preparing her family a roast chicken meal. Said meal was picked at later, but only after the shock of hearing her sister Sally pause, gasping and sobbing over the line, to tell Emily her sister Jane was in the hospital and would most likely never leave it.

September 8th, Night time - waited outside her sister Sallys house after a hurried drive. All the way on that hour trip she prayed, something she had never done before, and felt vaguely guilty about begging something she had no knowledge of for help. The phone call came around eleven, that Jane had suffered a heart attack when the Royal Flying Doctors plane she was in touched down at the Adelaide airport, and had suffered permanent, irreparable brain damage from lack of oxygen. She wanted to go with them, Jock and Sally and Shannon, but she was Jocks defacto and Shannons mother, so instead she tried as best she could to comfort her other niece Erin, and took her home.

September 9th, 1 in the morning - Installed in a state of shock so severe she could barely breathe, Emily made Erin and herself toasted cheese sandwiches while her brother John went and got Porky, her other brother, from their home. Dave was inconsolable, still reeling after her Mum's funeral and having experienced no loss of his own, so they eventually sat together at the kitchen table, silent, hands touching and not even once looking at each other. Some time later Helen and Kate turned up, family friends, Michaela in tow, and all stayed awake till the early hours. Still no news.

September 10th - after several garbled phone calls between Sally and John, it was confirmed that everybody with Jane had decided that it would be kinder to switch of the life support than let her suffer the indignites and pain she could never wake up from.

September 10th - late afternoon - early evening - Received the call.

Date Uknown, due to emotional black out - Buried Jane at a beautiful service in her town. Got thoroughly emotionally bashed by people she didn't know, just like the wake at her mother's funeral, and eventually said goodbye to Jane by receiving that kick in the heart that let her know that she'd never come back. Wondered why it always felt like the world was ending at these.

Christmas Day - Sad and small, but with precious moments. The girls got their first presents.

New Years 2008 - slept the night through. Both Emily and Dave were too tired from teething problems to even think about doing anything speicial.

That's about it. I still can't speak about Jane without using a third person explanation.
It still hurts. Mum, and her...it's so frustratingly awful I can't even begin to describe it. 

But I have my family, with such love and support its overwhelming at times. Its such a comfort to realise that in spite of tragedy, some things remain essentially the same - memories of days growing up in my mothers house, with Jane and then without, and the horribly awful relief that, after twenty years of illness, she might find piece of a sort with Mum, in where ever that place you go might be. It was the same with Mum, after the chemo and hospital rushes and all those damn drugs - somehow it helps to know that it's stopped.

Actually, everythings kind of stopped at the moment. My imaginations shot to shit, I can barely string two sentences together in script or voice [as you can plainly see, I seem to be suffering from short sentence syndrome]. One day I'll start writing again, but until then I just don't know. Bear with me? >.>


Your face lines my dreams

            and i've been dreamin', dreamin

for so long now
sleepin' on this    t r a i n   -  oo   - t r a i n   -  oo   - t r a i n
every thought

caress touched me once long ago

   is yours       and maybe it was mine
for some time
long                 long              ago far away....

and the whistles blow
   steam                     ng
wheels claw
and pound

wrestle the steel to the ground
               you'll board this train
punch   that ticket
taken away with the distant tides

and i'll be


forgotten in the 

d      e
   e         p

places  way

but you'll wait for me

out there, where the tides are still


you'll wait

and the whistles will call us